Knowing Who You're Not.
'I recorded my first album, The Sound of White in Los Angeles when I was 20 (or was it 19?.) The producer, John Porter, said to me very nicely one day: "Your accent, it's...very strong when you sing, isn't it? Perhaps, ah, we could tone it down a little? Some people might find it a bit distracting."
I took great offence. Not only did I not tone down my accent, I went even harder with it. "Boom, that'll show them," I remember thinking. "How dare anyone think that me singing in my own accent is distracting? I'm not f..king American!" The accent went on to become stronger out of sheer spite. "If this is going to polarise people," I thought, "I may as well not do it in halves."
Missy Higgins was 19 and working her first job - making her debut album. She was doing what she'd wanted to do since she was 12 - singing.
John Porter, effectively her boss, had produced his first album for The Smiths eight years before she was born and had worked with Roxy Music and Bryan Ferry.
He questioned who she was - she pondered and decided to defy him. At 19. In her first job. She decided to become herself.
Not half - but fully.
The Sound of White debuted at No. 1 and sold half a million copies.
A good decision is one that advances you towards where you want to be.
Good decision making is a deliberate process of inquiry that advances you towards where you want to be. You question or you're questioned. You search for your own answers, not someone else's.
If you look around and someone is following - buying half a million of your Widgets - you're a Leader.
If not - fine. You're still on your way to where you want to be.
The YouTube Test.
Ray Rice is a professional American football running back who is regarded as one of the best ever players for the Baltimore Ravens.
In February 2014 he assaulted his fiancée. The particulars of the assault were on the public record following his arrest.
In July 2014 the NFL suspended Rice for two games for violating its personal conduct policy by assaulting his fiancée.
In August 2014 the NFL Commissioner said that he 'didn't get it right' when giving Rice a two game suspension. He announced that in future such behaviour would attract a higher punishment. A six game suspension.
In September 2014 a video was posted online showing Rice punching his fiancée to unconsciousness.
The Ravens subsequently announced that his contract with its team had been terminated. The NFL said that he had been suspended indefinitely.
The NFL and the Ravens got new information and changed their minds. That's okay.
The new information?
Instead of the world reading that Ray Rice punched his fiancée in the face the NFL and Ravens knew that the world can see Ray Rice punch his fiancée in the face.
Let's test our declarations of commitment to transparency, integrity, values, accountability etc.
Next time you're considering - in Step 3 of the Five Steps to a Good Decision - a response to information that's in an email, phone call, letter or meeting - Imagine:
- Converting the information into a story and then a screenplay.
- Filming the screenplay.
- Posting the film to YouTube.
It's not your decision making process that the world will watch (boring) - it's the information that you're assessing. It's watching Ray Rice punch his fiancée instead of reading about it.
Wondering whether or how to discipline a staff member? Upload to your imagination. Post. Tweet. Watch.
The YouTube test isn't designed to encourage literal transparency or openness.
It's a forcing function that jolts us out of our deep grooves of unthinking responses to information so that we might see and respond to it in a different way.
Satisfaction.
'When I'm watchin' my TV
And a man comes on and tells me
How white my shirts can be
But he can't be a man 'cause he doesn't smoke
The same cigarrettes as me.'
- 'Satisfaction' - Jagger/Richards
You want to resolve complaints to the satisfaction of the complainant?
You want someone else's happiness to be a measure of your decisions?
Good luck.
Stick.
Dan: 'As somebody who feels like a person who knows so little and my knowledge is so incomplete. And yet know I'm supposed to be imparting knowledge to our kids and I kind of almost tried to give up on that and I try to just focus on good decision making.
'It's one thing if you tell your kid: 'Well just do it like this'. And it's another to just walk them through it. You know that if you walk them through it the right way that they'll learn about the thought process. Because I think that thought processes are teachable. Or learnable. Good, logical thinking is a learnable thing. It's one thing if your kid says 'Well how do I do this?' Or 'Why is it like this?' And you just tell them. As opposed to kind of leading them down the path to figuring out the answer on their own. That seems to stick a little bit better.'
Merlin: 'I find it so hard not to intervene. She's doing something - like she's learning to jump rope right now. And it's all I can do not to seize the thing out of her hand and go 'Look! Stand on it with your two feet like this, pull it up to here and if it reaches your waist that's the right length!' 'Cos she's got about half the length that she needs to do it. She keeps jammin' it into her ankle and it drives me crazy to watch. It's all I can do not to intervene. But you know - that's part of the process.'
Substitute 'employee' for 'kid'.
Wire.
A frightening amount of organisational decision making is based on this:
My decisions are superior to yours because once someone drew boxes connected by lines and put boxes above your box.
I'm in one of those boxes.
I know more than you because I'm Up Here.
If anyone doesn't like the decision from your box they can ESCALATE it up to me in mine and I can change it.
Reason: My box is higher than yours.
Know this.
I may give you the benefit of my descriptions of my view from Up Here if I get the time.
Like bread tossed from the back of a moving UNHCR truck.
Be grateful.
Marketing.
‘Our culture is marketing. What is marketing? Trying to get people to do what you want them to.
... the only goal is to get you to buy a product. The only goal. The only goal. The only goal. The only goal.'
Without Widget clarity and discipline, every meeting is a marketing meeting.
Everyone's in competition to sell themselves.
Buy my opinion (ie me) and not hers (ie her).
The Widget is incidental.
A passing vehicle towing billboards with my portrait: BUY ME!
The only goal.
Insubordination.
Almost twenty years ago a subordinate lied to me.
He told me that this video did not exist.
I was the Air Force Prosecuting Officer gathering evidence to prove beyond reasonable doubt that two 6 Squadron F111 pilots, call signs 'Buckshot 1' and 'Colt 1' had breached military discipline.
My Widget.
The Leading Aircraftsman amateur cameraman was a member of 6 Squadron and lied to protect his pilots.
His Widget.
I didn't have the video evidence in the trial and got my two convictions.
My Widget was made.
The LAC's video ended up with the Air Force Directorate of Flying Safety to make military flying safer.
His Widget was made.
Preside.
From the very beginning, Obama has been a presider rather than a decider. His modus operandi is to marshal existing political forces toward a particular, prgmatic set of goals.
- Andrew Sullivan
A good Leader Creates a Space.
She presides over that Space.
She holds it.
The measure of her power is not in what she does.
It's in what others do in that space.
It takes strength for her to hold that space against the forces that batter against it. Time. Money. Efficiency. Expediency. Fear. Ego.
And the most powerful of them all - her self-doubt.
'Preside' comes from the Latin praesidere - to stand guard over.
Anyone who creates a space and protects the process of discernment and decision making within - is a Leader.
Flawless.
'All the business of war, and indeed all the business of life, is to endeavor to find out what you don't know by what you do; that's what I called 'guessing what was at the other side of the hill.''
- The Duke of Wellington
'It was a flawless operation. It was just that the hostages weren't there.'
- Chuck Hagel, US Secretary of Defence.
A good decision is one that advances you towards where you want to be.
It takes discipline and courage to seek to execute a flawless operation instead of succumbing to the seduction of decisiveness.
That's why Leaders are brave.
Sure - you might solve a problem with instinct, intervention, positional power or luck.
Meanwhile, someone is planning their operation based upon the predictability of your decisions.
About where the hostages will be.
Rebellion.
'For nonconformity the world whips you with its displeasure.'
- Emerson
Creativity is bringing something new into the world.
Ideas. Suggestions. Alternatives. Inventions. New information.
The organisation does not like this.
Egos do not like this.
Your next meeting will not like this.
Those at the table will hear:
'Your technology is outdated. Your seat at the table is under threat.'
'What you knew is about to become redundant. Draw swords. Defend what you know! Charge!'
In the face of this the creator must choose:
Retreat.
Or Rebellion.
Most of us choose Retreat.
Every single day. Every meeting where we don't speak. Every honest conversation that we don't have. Every idea that we don't put forward.
No point fighting the boss.
(That's why organisations call it 'Engagement'. It's combat.)
White flags fluttering from every cubicle and office.
We're not engaged at work because we can't be bothered fighting.
We remain in our barracks and polish our boots and share stories about the last war. Rising occasionally to jealously discharge a sniper round at a passing Rebel.
While the Rebel Few bravely advance with their ideas, suggestions, alternatives, inventions, new information.
Civil war breaks out between the forces of Is and Could Be.
Charging beneath their banners coloured My Opinion and Your Opinion.
The original idea, suggestion, alternative, invention, information that ignited the war- is forgotten.
(Who shot the Archduke and why? No-one remembers. We honour the combatants of the Great War that followed.)
The organisation's rules, policies, hierarchies, performance reviews, promotions, compliance, accountability, value statements and reserved parking bays are like unguarded minefields.
Mostly maiming the Rebels.
Navigation.
'First of all, every time you begin a good work, you must pray to him most earnestly to bring it to perfection.'
- The Rule of Benedict, Prologue.
If the Widget is our purpose.
If the Widget is our North.
And we're not beginning our meetings with an acknowledgment of the Widget.
If we're not bringing it to the forefront of our minds - 'praying' for it as the Benedictine monks are told to do before they begin their work - so that it may not just be made - but be made to perfection.
Naming it.
If we're not checking, measuring, calibrating, correcting and discipling our conversations against the Widget.
It's proof that the Widget isn't the Widget.
The Widget is something else.
And we're all just kicking opinions along the company road.
Look up from the theory of the organisation's map to the reality of your surrounding terrain.
Who is at the meeting? (And isn't?)
What are they emphasising? (And ignoring?)
What are their reference points? (And not?)
Who makes the decision?
Is one even made?
Take your bearings from these solid landmarks.
There's your True North.
There's the Widget.
Assuming you care.
Try opening each meeting with the prayer:
'Lead us to the Widget, and deliver us from our egos.
Amen'.
Amplify.
'Watch Robin Williams while Craig Ferguson is talking. He's not leaping - he's not waiting to leap and say his next funny line. You can see him always pausing a beat to see where Craig Ferguson is taking it. And that's a sign of real generosity. He's so great at throwing the next ball that's going to respond to what you just said - amplify it - then also have something that he can throw back to you that you can make twice as funny too.'
- Merlin Mann
Grand words. Big words. Vision words.
Such as: Teamwork. Collaboration. Transparency. Learning. Disruptive. Creative. Accountable.
As simple as pausing a beat in a conversation.
Listen.
Generously.
Step back to allow another to step forward.
Amplify them.
Step back.
Invite them the next step forward.
Beat.
Dying to self.
Love in the workplace.
Give.
'You have to trust people and give them space if you want to get things done.'
- Mr Alec Coles, Chief Executive of the West Australian Museum
The first job of a Leader is to Create the Space.
Listen...
Golf.
'It was 'process' and 'spot.' That was it.'
- Rory McIlroy, 2014 British Open Golf Championship Winner
Rory McIlroy had teased journalists all week about two 'secret words' that he used before each golf shot. He'd reveal them if he won.
He won.
Process. Spot.
"With my long shots, I just wanted to stick to my process and stick to making good decisions, making good swings," he said. "The process of making a good swing, if I had any sort of little swing thoughts, just keeping that so I wasn't thinking about the end result, basically."
It's all about the Widget. It's not about the Widget.
'Spot' was before each putt.
"I was just picking a spot on the green and trying to roll it over my spot," he said. "I wasn't thinking about holing it. I wasn't thinking about what it would mean or how many further clear it would get me. I just wanted to roll that ball over that spot. If that went in, then great. If it didn't, then I'd try it the next hole."
A good putt is one that advances you towards the hole.
A good decision is one that advances you towards where you want to be.
Good decision making is a deliberate process of inquiry that advances you towards where you want to be.
Process. Spot.
Guns.
'...be prepared to punish immediately and mercilessly.'
- Reinhard K. Sprenger in his book 'Trust', on how to respond to a failure to acknowledge a breach of trust.
'Why does the military need the DFDA?' I asked the classroom of First Year Cadets and Midshipmen at the Australian Defence Force Academy.
I was delivering another lesson in the Defence Force Discipline Act.
No hands went up.
'Why do you need your own military laws? Why can't you just be subject to the same criminal laws as every other resident of Canberra? Of Australia?' No response.
They looked uncomfortable. Unlike 18 year olds at civilian universities, my rank demanded their attention and they had to pretend to give it.
Finally, a hand slowly rose.
'Yes?' I said, nodding towards the red-faced Army cadet.
'Sir, because we've got guns in our bedrooms, Sir?'
His classmates laughed.
'Correct.'
Sailors, soliders and airmen who are caught breaching society's laws, values or implied rules of behaviour are subjected to higher media attention and scrutiny and public shaming than the average civilian who might do the same.
Rightly so.
A democracy makes a deal with its 18 year olds with uniforms and guns.
We trust you.
We'll fall asleep in leafy suburbs next door to where you slumber beside your weapons.
We trust you not to turn those weapons on us.
We know History. We can't afford not to give you uniforms and guns.
We know History. We can't afford to wait to see whether our trust in you with guns was misplaced. That would be too late.
Instead -
We demand that you have higher levels of behaviour enforced by extra criminal laws.
We'll let you come onto our streets with your guns as long as we see you marching in controlled, neat, shiny, uniform ranks and snapping to attention when ordered to by superiors who have superiors who have superiors who defer to our elected government who we can vote out and ridicule on talk back radio and on Facebook.
If you behave in any way that hints that our trust in you might be a mistake:
Then we'll punish you immediately and mercilessly and publicly - disproportionately than if you were an unarmed teenager.
It's not your misogyny, pot smoking, petty theft, drunkenness, harassment or racist emails that we want to protect ourselves from.
It's your judgement.
And the guns in your bedroom.
Power.
'The law always limits every power it gives.'
- David Hume
Step 2 of the Five Steps to a Good Decision: Name the Issue.
It's only an Issue if you have the power to make a decision in support of your Widget.
Ask: What power do I have?
Look for it in your contract.
Look for it in your policies.
Look for it in what your boss has said she expects of you.
No power? Then there is no Issue and therefore no decision required of you. Inform someone who does have the power.
Power?
Then ask:
What are the conditions or restrictions on the exercise of that power?
Welcome them. They give focus. Quieten the noise.
If you have a power - you have limits.
Be clear on what they are.
(You'll often find them in your Values.)
Then continue to Step 3.
Freedom.
'No science will give them bread as long as they remain free. In the end, they will lay their freedom at our feet and say to us, "make us your slaves, but feed us."
'So long as man remains free, he strives for nothing so incessantly and so painfully as to find someone to worship."
'I tell Thee that man is tormented by no greater anxiety than to find someone quickly to whom he can hand over that gift of freedom with which the ill-fated creature is born."
- Fydor Dostoevsky, 'The Grand Inquisitor'.
The boss gives us bread in exchange for our days.
The boss is an altar upon which we lay our laments.
The boss relieves us from the anxiety of freedom.
The boss is our alibi.
Burden.
'You're asking me to quash his conviction?'
'Yes Sir.'
'Even though he pleaded guilty?'
'Yes Sir.'
'The Law is an ass, Bernard.'
Air Commodore Smith was a 'one star' general equivalent.
He'd graduated from the RAAF Academy the year I was born.
He was an Engineer. A Fighter Pilot.
He was flying Mirage fighters at twice the speed of sound at 40,000 feet over Malaysia during the Vietnam War when I was still in nappies.
He was a Member of the Most Excellent Order of the British Empire
He was the Air Officer Commanding Western Australia.
He had a wife and grown up children.
He was my boss.
I was in my mid-twenties. Three years out of Law School. Four ranks and a thousand years junior to him in work and military and life experience.
'The Defence Force Discipline Act allows you to seek a higher legal opinion if you're not comfortable with mine, Sir,' I explained to him.
'Not necessary,' he said as he signed his acceptance of my review and recommendation to quash the conviction of the cannabis smoking airman on the basis of an error of law. 'You've explained your reasons both in your written report and verbally to me today and I accept the stupidity of the Law, not you. I'm going to bring this legal loophole to the attention of the other Base Commanders at our conference at Headquarters next week. They need to know about it.'
A month later, a file 'Command Legal Matters' was marked out to me by Wing Commander Oliver, the Air Commodore's Administrative Staff Officer. I opened it and found a copy of a letter that was marked to me 'For Information'.
It was a letter from the Air Officer Commanding Training Command, a two star general equivalent and my boss's boss. It was written to all the Air Force Base Commanders in Training Command - including my boss. It referred to the recent Commanders Conference and the jurisdiction issue I had cited to recommend quashing the conviction. It was admonishing my boss for quashing the conviction based upon my legal advice.
One line stands out in my memory: 'There is no place for High Court decisions in the administration of summary hearings under the Defence Force Discipline Act on Bases. Command Legal have confirmed this. Commanders should therefore seek higher headquarters legal advice in future before quashing convictions based on jurisdictional grounds. '
The Air Commodore never mentioned the letter nor his boss's criticisms of him at his commanders conference to me, let alone my legal superiors' contradictions. I don't even think that he intended the letter to come to me - otherwise he would have spoken to me about it rather than have me find out via a marked out file. He must not have thought it important.
Air Commodore Smith backed me. He backed me over the commanding officer whose guilty verdict he quashed. He backed me in front of his boss. He backed me before his peers. He backed me when he could have gone to my legal superiors for a second opinion. He backed me even though he disagreed with the legal outcome as a matter of common sense. He backed me when my own legal superiors did not. He backed me with the same business-as-usual manner as he would return my salutes if we passed each other or crack his lawyer jokes.
Air Commodore Smith didn't need to hear a Supreme Court Judge affirm my legal reasoning at a Legal Officers conference six months later. He continued to challenge, question, and ultimately back my advice to him for the remainder of my posting as his legal adviser.
His faith in me was a huge burden. It increased my self-doubt because I had to continue to live up to his total reliance on me and I thought I could not. It made me feel more exposed, rather than protected. It made me more careful and diligent in the legal advice that I gave to him. It made me accept other decisions that he made as the Base Commander that I did not necessarily understand or agree with because I trusted him based upon the way that I had seen him go about his decision making. It connected me to him. It made me a better legal officer, lawyer and person. His trust in my judgement and legal ability and officer qualities was hard to live up to.
Which was another gift that Air Commodore Smith gave me.
He just assumed I was up to it.