Only One Thing Worse.

There’s only one thing worse than being criticised to your face.

Not being criticised to your face.

The critic who takes their criticism elsewhere, even if it’s only in their judgement of me, denies me (and them) the opportunity to be heard.

I am forever defined by an interpretation of my words or behaviour. I am, in the eyes of the critic, anyone they tell, and for those the tellers tell, frozen in time as the sum of a speck of a fraction of my life.

The critic and their followers are denied the rest of me, and I am denied them.

I am denied the opportunity to correct my course and be better. To say sorry.

And I’m oblivious.

Instead of the sharp slap and sting of direct criticism quickly soothed by time, the silent critic sows an unseen, unfelt, undiagnosed tumour within my soul, numbing the feeling between us.

The law recognises the humanity of giving a person the right to hear first hand the criticism. To allow me to remedy, heal, and ‘shape the course of my future conduct’ - including with them.

Step 5 of the Five Steps to a Good Decision: Give a Hearing.